Stan Apps

Stan Apps

Market Freakout

traders they are irrational like a force of nature if they freak out, no make that WHEN they freak out they will freak out sooner or later and they’ll take us all down sooner or later like a force of nature they’ll freak out they can’t be stopped or reasoned with for entirely rational, logical reasons they’ll go totally freakily illogically crazy and you can’t blame them then for taking us all down for it will be the logic of the market the perfect streamlined all-controlling logic of the market that freaks them, flips them, makes them sooooo scared they’ll sell everything they own or don’t own at firesale prices and everything that we own or don’t own will be along for the ride as if we didn’t really own anything, really sort of like we were still peasants all along but we were just borrowing all this non-peasant stuff, but we had to give it back the only way we can stop their irrational pessimistic freakoutism from annihilating all value is to give them boatloads of money they’ll have to spend a while annihilating the value of all that money it will delay them it’s sort of like blackmail except they’re not responsible they’re too irrational to be culpable if crazy people annihilate the value it’s not their fault because they were crazy at that time and also because what made them crazy is the mercilessly total rationality of the market which also can’t be blamed it would be like blaming the truth for being true unfair the truth can’t help being true it’s in its nature this totally unavoidable value-annihilating freakout it’s in the nature it’s in the nature of how the market conducts totally rational business transactions through us transactions that totally rationally extract value out of value until someone freaks out totally upon noticing how abstract containers of value slump inwards at extreme and sudden roller-coaster-like angles throwing our perspective around like a Michael Bay tracking shot it’s in the nature nothing we can do about it except pay our money and since we’ve got our tickets might as well sit there and watch it might be entertaining in some kind of way VALUE-ANNIHILATING FISCAL DISASTER, sounds good maybe at the end we’ll even clap or maybe just sit there some more?

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